Carol and The Danish Girl Review

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My Dream Man. (Matthias Schoenaerts)

 

I’m no movie critic, but I sure as hell watch a lot of movies and this is my blog so…:

I was really looking forward to seeing the movie Carol because Cate Blanchett is amazing (gorgeous and ahhh her voice!) but I was bored out of my mind.  After watching, I didn’t believe there was a bisexual or gay bone in either of the characters bodies.  There wasn’t an ounce of chemistry between Cate and Mara, it was awkward to watch and unconvincing.  I’m straight and I was insulted, I can’t imagine how a lesbian would feel about that part of the plot development.  Cate Blanchett carries the whole movie, but the love scenes between the characters were so bland?  After watching great shows like “The L Word” my standards include, believability.   We were supposed to think they fell in love, but there wasn’t any convincing chemistry going on to draw me in and make me believe.  I’d have bought it, if there had been some sizzle, but this was a complete dud.

The set and costumes were great, along with the example of how hard it was to be who you wanted/needed to be in those days.

The Danish Girl was another disappointment.  However, somebody please give Eddie Redmayne another Oscar, immediately.  Forget voting, just order the damn thing and hand it to him already.  He is phenomenal and gifted.  He played a woman better than I live as a born woman, I really need to exude more feminism and wear red lipstick more often!  My complaint with The Danish Girl is the same as Carol, I didn’t buy the amorous connection.  Once Einer becomes a woman, the dynamic between her and Gerda is underdeveloped, moving into lapses where we don’t know what’s transpired in between or why the characters are feeling the way they are.  I was disappointed.

The actor that plays Hans in this movie is so attractive, why isn’t he famous?  He is HOT, HOT, habanero chili Hot!   My jaw dropped when he appeared on the screen.  I had a moment where I looked around the dark theater like, are you seeing this man?  Is he a real person?

Oh, and I don’t know if it was a set or a real place, but I want a house that looks like their Paris home in the movie!  The tapestry’s were, WOW.

I’m glad that more people will learn about Lily and the roads she paved, I don’t understand it, but it sure is brave.  And bravery in any woman, is always commendable in my book!

Once Han’s character is introduced, make sure you have an iced drink in your theater cup holder and maybe a handheld fan, because he is FIRE!!!! Haaa

 

 

 

Do You Like Yo-yo Balls?

Whacking my friend on the arm:….

Do those quarter machine prizes look like sperm to you? No? Really? Hmnn…

Whispering into my friends ear:….

Do you have any quarters? I really want to buy some yo-yo balls, yo.

I finally break her, we burst out in laughter…

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How Does Johnny Depp do it?

I didn’t even realize this was Johnny Depp when I was watching the trailer!  AMAZING!  I can’t wait to see this one!  Southpaw was really good because Jake Gyllenhaal is gorgeous but it was pretty much Rocky remade for the 21st century. FYI

James Corden is the Best Thing Ever

And I love Rod and Rocky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS yesSSSSSSSSSSsssssssss YESSSSSSSSS

Single Woman BBQ

My Bbq looks sad but it’s awesomely marinated meat (That I can’t pronounce) from the Mexican market butcher, he puts orange juice in the marinade it comes out so tender!?(Thank you to my friend, Cruz for teaching me to go there!) Look at my cute little Hillshire farm hotlink, I swear

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nothing beats those, always juicy, not as big as the other brands but who cares. And mushrooms and eggplants were on sale sooo…

I was doing great with the low carb thing, huh?  Until I poured my second beer……burrrp…😆👩👍👊🍻🍻🍻🍻🍻🍴🍴