Did my muscles let go of my thigh skin?

I walked by the mirror in my closet-room today and saw something no person should have to see.  The skin on my legs wiggled a little bit.  I even walked backwards and tried it again in slow motion.   My thigh skin used to be tightly connected to my muscles; it wasn’t a separate entity?  So, I did what any reasonable middle-aged woman would do. I grabbed my car keys, hauled ass, and joined a gym.  I approached the counter,  like a person buying drugs in a hushed voice and their darkest sunglasses. It went something like this, whispering, “Excuse me, I think I would like to join the gym.”  I even did the finger-pointing thing that looks like you are pushing buttons in the direction of girls on a treadmills. Just incase she didn’t know what I was talking about.  As the girl started to fill in my information, I glanced around and pushed my ray bans further up my nose like I was doing surveillance.  Did I mention, I was already sweating from the walk in and I had yet to take the complimentary tour?  I thought I was being really clever during that by holding my bag in a way that masked my exposed thighs.  Actually, I clung to it like a security blanket.  I’m planning on letting the jumbo bag go tomorrow and moving up to an adult sippy cup that fits in that hole built right into the elliptical.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s